Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Best Ways of Letting People Know You're Not Wearing Underwear

Request a game of exclusively pants-based Truth or Dare.

Spill X-ray glasses onto your crotch.

Say what a influential impact Mark Lester's 1985 film Commando had on you.

Insist on being on top of the human pyramid and then take a lot of leg-straddled breaks.

Open your diary at the coffee shop and ask the people around you, "What makes more sense, boxerless or sans underwear?"

Demand to play strip poker, get everyone to agree and then complain how it's not fair because everyone else has one extra layer.

Ask if your non-underwear lining is showing.

1 comment:

  1. Another suggestion, Simon - though yours are immaculately spread out. When you come out of the restroom (if you're a Mo and wearing a skirt or a dress) you loudly proclaim - " I just helped the earth by not using your toilet tissue. I'm just going to air dry " - then turn (hopefully with enough swing to reveal just the bottom of your none covered ass) and skip out of the room.